CHRISTMAS 2012

Christmas 2012


This has been a very busy year for the Benders here in sunny Florida. Thought I’d just give you a few highlights from our year to bring you all up to date. In January Mary flew to California to celebrate the 80th birthday of our sister in law Thelma. I had a great time visiting with my siblings and extended family members.

We had a very quiet season as our only relative that spent this winter in Florida was Mary’s brother Joseph. We did however; get to visit with a lot of our classmates and friends at the local Columbus Indiana Day gathering held here in South Florida. At our Fun Day here in Leisure Lake Phil was the hit of the parade. He took first place for the second year in a row, this year by making a tank out of our golf cart. As always we are very involved with our church and activities here at our home park. This year we also attended many plays at the local theater located just across the river in Bradenton. On March 27th we celebrated our 30th Anniversary.

On March 31st we boarded a plane bound for Sydney Australia. After several days visiting Sydney we joined our shipmates aboard the Royal Caribbean “Radiance of the Seas”. Leaving Australia we headed over to New Zealand for a couple of days. After several days at sea we visited the French Polynesia Islands of Tahiti, Moorea and Bora Bora. Another five days of cruising found us in Hawaiian waters. After visiting Hilo we were off to the island of Oahu for a two night stay in the city of Honolulu. While there we had a great visit with our Granddaughter Jackie and her family, whom we had not seen in several years. Leaving Oahu we spent the next six days visiting the islands of Kauai, Maui, Kailua and Hilo By April 29th we had left all land behind and for the next 7 days we were at sea until we reached Vancouver, British Columbia. During our 30 day cruise we enjoyed so many wonderful meals, played lots of fun games, saw many great shows, Mary enjoyed daily Mass where she got to do almost all of the readings, and best of all we renewed our wedding vows along with about 40 other couples at a special onboard celebration of marriage.

In May we flew to Indiana for the high school graduation of our youngest Granddaughter, Alexandria. It was good to visit many of our family while in Kentucky and Indiana. It was a fast 5 day trip home and never it seems enough time to see all and do all that you want before the time is gone and you are on your way home.

This summer has been filled with many, too many, doctor and hospital appointments. Storms that have come and gone, thankfully not touching us, even though we did prepare for some, just in case. Phil has completely redone his outside shed and our last big project has been our kitchen. Like the shed, we removed everything before replacing all the kitchen cabinets, floors etc. All we kept was the fridge & sink. I feel like I have been camping for the last two months and living in a storage locker with so many boxes in the L.R. But soon everything will be completed and we will so enjoy our pretty new kitchen. In November we have the Presidential Elections to get through; Mary will be in charge of our local precinct which will bring several busy days connected with that event. By early November we will both be off for separate trips up north. Mary is going to fly into Michigan then drive with daughter Marybeth to Wisconsin for a wonderful 1 week visit with all the children, grandchildren and great grandchildren that I have not seen for 3 years. Philip is flying into Indianapolis to spend 2 weeks with all his family. He will be celebrating Thanksgiving and his birthday with all of them for the first time in many years. Mary is looking forward to spending Thanksgiving with her brother Joseph who will be here for the winter season. We are looking forward to hearing from all of you during this upcoming holiday season. WISHING HAPPY HOLIDAYS TO ALL OF OUR FAMILY AND FRIENDS.

Phil and Mary Bender   Below is a picture of us driving Santa into Wine & Cheese Xmas Party

2011 Christmas Letter

CHRISTMAS 2011
Aloha to all and Melikauke Maka

Well to say the very least, in a nut shell; we have had a hectic year. At the end of 2010 we attended a Military Ball w/ the Knights of Columbus 4th Degree Assemblies. Mary had cataract surgery in December, and we spent Christmas with friends & family in the park.

Mary is now an Assistant Clerk with the County Election Board, and also the President for the 2010-2011 season of the Leisure Lake Women’s Fellowship. We are still in charge of showing movies here at our park and we both enjoy that very much. Mary and sometimes Phil have been doing readings at Mass on both Sundays and weekdays. Phil keeps busy with the K of C both regular and the 4th degree as he prepares refreshments for after the meetings. Some of Phil’s other activities include golf, several times a week, helps to provide music for our Saturday morning coffee hour. He has taken a larger interest in Art, and has done several portraits in colored pencil. We have both been going about every six weeks to the local nail spa where we enjoy having pedicure treatments on our feet. Don’t know why it took us so long to find out just how wonderful this makes you feel.

In January, we together with our friends, Jim & MaryAnn Miller, went on a park sponsored cruise to Mexico. While we were on that cruise we booked another cruise next spring to celebrate our 30th Wedding Anniversary. You will have to wait for next years Christmas letter to hear the details of this upcoming trip.

February proved to be special, as Twin Martha and hubby Jim came to visit for 3 weeks. Of course, Brother Joseph is up near Tampa just an hour away and sister Betty lives in Bradenton so we all had a great time visiting together. Even took in a Polo match while they were here.... picnic on the sidelines, stomped the divots at half time and all. Also brother Gary and Alitza were here for Jan, Feb & March so they were included in all the fun things we did during February. Phil, Gary & his friend Don played a lot of music up at the hall for park events. We also had a sad thing happen during February as we lost a Great Grand Baby, Grace. Jessica and Chris were so looking towards the birth of their first baby. We all feel that she is now in that special place that God makes for babies like her and her two uncles Jacob & Joshua.

In March Phil & Gary got in a short fishing trip...lots of fun...but few fish. And then by the end of March everyone went back North and the park became very quiet again. By the way, March 27th brought surprises to Mary. Phil got her to Emerson Point, a nearby park on the beach, under the pretext of a music program. But when we got there our friends, Don & Jane Conn, had a table set up with wine, a wonderful meal, real wine glasses and table service. Mary’s favorite French music playing completed the picture (overlooking the waters of Terra Ceia Bay) for our 29th Wedding Anniversary. Surprise, Surprise... so romantic. What a wonderful gift from Phil.

In April Mary was asked to help read “The Passion” at Church on Palm Sunday and Phil took part in the “Washing of the Feet” on Holy Thursday. Both of these things made a very special Easter for us. Betty went in the hospital for surgery on April 20th, and while she was there, on the 27th, Phil called home announcing that he was having a heart attack while on the golf course. After 5 days in the hospital and a triple bypass on his heart he came home and played music the following Saturday at coffee hour needless to say he was doing great. Betty on the other hand was not. She was in the hospital and then rehab until May 10th. Mary had such a time taking care of both of them and found it much easier when Betty’s Granddaughter came to take her back home to New Jersey to live. We would like to thank our relatives and friends that got us through those difficult times. Especially son Todd and Joyce who had come down for a planned vacation and were here to help bring Phil home from the hospital. Our friends Don, Jane, Carol & Dan, what can we say, without their support we would have never survived as well as we did.

May is a blank for Phil, what with being in the hospital, lots of trips to the doctors and in general just getting back to his old self... of course he hated that he was not allowed to drive or play golf for so many weeks. Mary was busy with Cheyenne, the student, at the Manatee School of the Arts that she has been mentoring for the past 2 years. Cheyenne will graduate this month and go on to college in the fall. Our daughter Marybeth & hubby Steve took a trip to Europe while their son, Scott is stationed in Germany. In fact during August their son Eric went over to visit with his brother...great bonding time for the two boys, great memories for the whole family.

June was hectic with more doctor’s visits and Phil got to start driving again on June 1st.

July, Oh Good, our favorite bike race, the Tour DeFrance, was on TV again and we watched it every day. Mary & Phil took over the coffee hour duties for the park during July thru September. On July 18th Mary had a Heart Ablation to help with her racing heart from A-Fibrillation....this all happened due to a problem with a new meds that they gave to her that did not work out well. As we said lots of doctor visits during June and July.

August found Phil making many trips to St. Pete VA for cardiac rehab....this four week program was very good for him. Also decided to bite the bullet and get our golf cart repairs, sometimes it would start and other times not. Hated to spend the money but am enjoying have a working cart again. Back in March Phil had made this cart into an elephant for the fun day parade. The theme was circus and he took first place.

During September Mary’s favorite soap opera went off the air after 41 years, she was sad to see it go as it has been a part of her life for such a long time. We are now becoming a part of the local Arts Community here in Southern Florida as we have season tickets for the local Manatee Players Theatre and have been to see several recorded productions of plays in famous theatres from New York & Europe. One being Henry the Eight filmed at the Shakespeare Globe Theatre in London

In October we flew to Indianapolis, borrowed a car from son Todd, and after Martha & Jim arrived from California we all drove to Columbus. A classmate, Terry Trautman and his wife Linda had made us an offer we could not refuse... a 5 night stay at the Traut Haus. It was great as we were all involved in the planning and set up for our 55th Class Reunion. They have a beautiful home and were gracious hosts. What a great reunion we had, so much fun visiting with old classmates whom we’ve not seen for the past five years. We also made time to visit with our brothers and sister while in Columbus but must say the time flew by so fast that it was impossible to visit with all the friends that we wanted to see and too soon it was time to leave Indiana and be on our way home to Florida.

November found Phil flying back to Chicago for his guitar convention, great music and fun time with friends while Mary had some much needed down time. The snow birds are fast filling up the park and should all be in by the last of this month. Phil has volunteered to help with Bingo, we will see how long he can take it. We are still enjoying the local theatre and brother Joe will be in Florida very soon. If the weather cooperates we may have Judy and her family down around Christmas time. We look forward to all your cards and letters and send you all wishes for a very Happy Holiday Season.



Phil & Mary Bender PO Box 187, Palmetto, FL 34220

September 29 - October 4, 2011 Indiana Trip

This was a trip that Martha & Jim / Mary & Phil took to Indiana to celebrate the Class of 1956 55th Class Reunion. Our gracious hosts were Terry & Linda Trautman. Terry is also a classmate of ours and was chairperson of the Reunion Committee of which "The Twins" were a big part of. This is the story of our trip.

Thursday September 29th ... up at 4:30 AM scales 126.5 pretty darn close to my original goal of 125. A banana as a start to breakfast then it was off to the Tampa Airport with Louie & Lauri Agee. Really impressed with our first time use of the Body Scanner, much better than having a hand pat down. We both breezed thru it with no problems. Found our gate then we finished our breakfast and waited for our plane to Chicago O'Hara. During our layover at O'Hara we had our lunch...my diced peppers had come through security just fine and Phil had a sandwich. Arrived in Indianapolis and found Todd waiting to pick us up with the convertible..cute car but no trunk space. We drove over to where Joyce works. Picked her, Emily and Karley up then went to lunch with them..as we had already had lunch I had some garlic bread and a salad. Outside we asked if we could have the use of Joyce's car as it had a much larger trunk. Was great to visit with them while waiting for Martha & Jim to come in at almost 7 pm. Back at the airport I had a half Mexican burrito and saved the other half for Jim to eat.It was almost 9 by the time we arrived at Terry & Linda Trautman's House for our first night.

Friday, September 30th up at 6:30 Worked on Reunion papers then went out to visit Joseph and shop at Walmart on way home to buy poster board etc. Also picked up some spinach and veggie patties. Back home we all worked on putting together the Poster Boards for the reunion. For our evening meal, the Jansen's treated us all, including classmate, Tom Hilger & wife to dinner at Smiths Row. We all came back to the Trautman house after dinner and sat around visiting until about 10:30 PM.

Saturday, October 1st up at 6:30 at noon we drove downtown to the Visitor Center for a tour of the Miller Home. On our way we happened to stop by the Old City Hall, our Great Grandfather Brockman was one of the builders and has his name on a front cornerstone. We started a conversation with the new owners who are restoring the building to be office space and apartments. They invited us inside for a tour. It was fun to see the inside as neither of us had been inside since High School. We shared with them stories of the building during the 1950's. The tour of the Miller Home was great. Again this was built during our last year of High School and had always remained hidden behind landscaping... a well known architect design it...but then that’s not surprising as Columbus is well known for it's architect and the Miller family always brought in people famous for their designs.

Well I had completly typed this day and was into Sunday when it disappeared... now I have to retype so think I will wait until tomorrow to do this as I am tired. It's 9 AM Friday and I will try to finish this blog up before I go anywhere. Even tho I was really tired last night I still didn't sleep well.

By 3 PM we were off to the New Elks Club to decorate for the Class of 1956, 55th Reunion. By 4:30 people had already started arriving. Myself & Helen took care of the sign in table, Martha was the official photographer and Terry was the M/C. Linda sat with us at the sign in table to sell Terry’s just published book “My Columbus Was Different From Yours”. A good buffet dinner was served and Terry delivered a great program. We were delighted to see that many people stayed around afterwards to check out all the photo boards and to get reacquainted with old friends. We were back home by 9 PM where we continued the evening with more wine and conversation.

Sunday, October 2nd up at 6:30 again light breakfast and off to 8 AM Mass at St. Bartholomew’s. At 10:30 we all 6 went off for brunch, by the Benders, at the Hanger Five Restaurant. By 2 we were off to sister Shirley’s house to spend the rest of the day with her and brother Joseph. Joseph brought his youngest grandson, Tommy, with him as we had never met him... lots of fun with a 2 year old. Also got to visit with old friends Paulette and Donna. This was the first time that Martha had met Shirley’s friend Larry. At 5 we all adjourned to the Red Lobster to for a great meal provided by Shirley & Joe. We thought that we should have treated them as it was Joe’s birthday...but they insisted, so we were gracious and said Thank You. Following dinner we went back to Shirley’s house for cake and ice cream. After which we made our way out to Garland Brook to visit family graves and get a last view of our old house that is due to be torn down soon. Back at the Trautman’s more wine was had with lots of discussion of their upcoming trip to France with the Jansen’s come next April.

Monday, October 3rd up at 7:30 After breakfast we were on our way to visit Gary & Alitza. Gary, Phil and Terry all went for 9 holes of golf while I visited with Alitza. During our visit Alitza and I did get out and walked....very slowly... around the block at her house. After the guys came home we had a quick lunch...the guys played some music while we gals continued to watch TV and talk. At 3 we left for Edinburgh to meet cousins Jerry & Betty Ruth at Ruby Tuesdays for an early dinner on the Benders. Leaving the restaurant we went back to the Garland Brook to get more pictures of our old house before continuing on back to the Traut Haus. They had spent the day planning for their upcoming trip to France and had a late dinner of Steak etc after we returned home. A great evening was had by all as we watched the Colts Football Game and Dancing with The Stars. The top off of the evening was a glass of Lemon Chello......

Tuesday, October 4th up early to finish packing then off to the airport by 10 AM. Dropped off the Jansen’s and continue over to pick Joyce up at her work. Back to the airport by noon..checked in and visited with the Jansen’s while we all waited for our 2 PM flights home. We had about 3 hours layover in Chicago home by 9 and back in Palmetto with Louie & Laurie by 10 PM... only mishap was on the way home Louie went thru the SunPass gate so we didn’t pay our dollar for the bridge.. don’t know what will happen with that.... as we may get a ticket. Martha & Jim arrived in New York without their checked luggage but it did turn up the next day. A Great Time Was Had By All

January 2011 thru May 17, 2011

Thought that I would take this way to post about our lives these past few months.

January was a very busy month as all of our snowbirds were back in Florida from up North. I spent many hours working on a committee doing an audit of the Leisure Lake Financial books, did a weekly visit as a mentor to a high school senior girl, counted money at church on Mondays, did readings during the weekly mass on Mondays and a couple of Sunday masses. At the end of January we went on a 5 night cruise to Mexico with a large group of people who live in our park. A wonderful trip on the Royal Carribbean Cruise lines Radiance of the Seas ship. Meanwhile Philip stayed very busy playing a lot of music with his brother (& wife) and his friend Don who are all here for a three month season. They are renting places here in the park. He also plays alot of golf with his brother and other friends here in the park. He is a member of the Knights of Columbus and the Fourth Degree Knights of Columbus. With the 4th he is in charge of bringing a meal each month for all the guys...this he really enjoys as it gives him a chance to show off his cooking skills. In addition to all this we have alot of other activites within the park that we are involved with. Makes me tired just listing all of this. This is why I decided to slow down and uninvolve myself with many of the things that I am doing. So next season (October thru April)my life will not be quite so hetic.

February: Coming back from our cruise we were joined for 3 weeks by Martha and 2 weeks by Jim. Really enjoyed their company and it was fun to do things with them. They were good about entertaining themselves when we had doctors appointment etc that were already scheduled before we knew that they were coming. One Sunday we all went to a Polo Game...a first for the Jansens. Knew that Jim would enjoy it as the halftime entertainment was a parade of vintage Porche cars. A good time was had by all that day. We had several days where family members came in to visit with everyone. Another Sunday Phil put on a Guitar Jam for guitar players from Florida gathered at our park for an afternoon of great music. He has put this on now for 3 years. After the Jansens went back to California we hosted a dinner for all the people in the park that came to Florida from the midwest states...about 80 people in all. The park has three special dinners each year..one for our Canadians and Eastern States another for everybody from the state of Michigan and the one that we hosted the Heartland Dinner.

March: Another very busy month with...as I look at my calendar...so filled with events in the park and doctor appointments. On Fun Day the parade theme was circus and Phil turned our golf cart into an Elephant...it took first place. Of course all the things that I talked about happening in January were also on going during February and March.

April: At last things are starting to slow down abit. Many of our snowbirds are leaving to go back north and Phil's brother and friend have also gone home. He still is playing music on Saturday morning coffee hour and has started giving guitar lessons to a fellow who lives near us. Phil is teaching himself to play the large organ that is at the clubhouse and is getting quite good on it. I have had to do quite abit of running with my sister Betty this month as she is going thru a bunch of test and will have surgery on April 20th. The surgery went well but she developed heart problems and ended up in ICU for many days. By the 25th she was so bad that her daughter flew in on the 26th. On the 27th Phil called me from the golf course saying he was in the middle of a heart attack. As he was very close to the VA medical clinic he got himself to it and they took over taking him to the hospital where they determined that he needed a triple bypass heart surgery.

Early morning on the 29th he had his surgery so now I had 2 people in the same hospital but on different floors... both in intensive care units...
By the night of the 30th Phil was doing much better and my sister had moved to a Rehab Center. To my releif Phil's son Todd and his wife arrived on May 3rd. This was a long planned vacation trip for them that worked out so good for us as they were a big help to me with having Betty on the other side of town. On May 4th Phil came home from the hospital. On May 9th I spent the day at Betty's apartment supervising a moving company in packing up her things for a move north to her daughters home in New Jersey. The next day I picked her up and spent the day doing things with her before putting her and a granddaughter on a plane for New Jersey.
As I said having Todd and Joyce visit at this time was such a big help to me. Meanwhile life goes on as we try to stabilze Phils sugar.

I have continued since last year with my plant based way of eating. I did add yogurt & cheese back into my diet but otherwise have stayed true to my vegetatrian way of eating. Maintaining my weight and controlling my diebetes has been a great motivator to keep on doing my thing.

During Phils stay in the hospital his sugar and parkinson got so out of control it was scary...he was having lots of problems with both until I got him back home and on a schedule. He is now eating a mostly plant based diet with a small amount of chicken and we have his sugar back in a good place with a greatly reduced amount of insulin needed to keep his blood sugar in control. Am sure he is tired of me telling him what to do all the time but it seems to be working as today he had his last visit from the home nurse who said he is doing great..in fact he said that his wounds look like he is 4 weeks out from surgery and not just 2 1/2. So guess I must be doing all the right things and will continue to push (gently guide) him in the right direction.

Well think I have just about come to the end of my tale. Tonight one of the fellows picked Phil up, as he can not drive for another 2 weeks... and 4 more weeks after that before he can even think about playing golf or carrying any muscial instruments around. Anyway he got to go to his monthly music group gathering so he felt good about that. We did have another sad event in February as we lost a baby great granddaughter who was stillborn with Potters syndrome. Sad time for the family.
If you look at the pictures posted below this blog you will see pictures from several of the activities that I have talked about in this blog.

Polo Game Sarasota FL February 2011

Cruise to Mexico February 2011

Family visits Florida February 2011